This story made me ball like a baby 😭 What a tribute to his wife & new baby girl. Thanks for sharing your story with us Matt 🦸🏻♂️🦸🏻♀️
A birth story……..From a first time Father 💥
After my partner had started having contractions on Friday night she gave birth to our beautiful daughter Sunday afternoon.
After her waters broke at 12:30am on Sunday morning we called up the hospital and was asked to go in to be checked. After being checked she was told that she wasn’t having full contractions yet. So my partner came back out to the corridor, (where I have to wait) and told me that she had to either walk around for a few hours, go home or go onto the ward without me until she was 4cm dilated. She was a little worried because she felt like she was having full contractions. We decided it was best for me to go grab a couple of hours sleep in the car on the car park while she went to the ward to be fully examined. At this time she was told she was only 3cm dilated which after 2 days of contractions was a bit demoralising, especially after them being so painful.
After just over an hour I got the message I was waiting for. As the ward had a private room empty and hardly anyone else there, they agreed to let me in early so that I could be there with my partner. Because of this I only missed an hour of the whole labour process at the hospital. And for that I will be eternally grateful to University Hospital Burton. After 9 months of no dads to be at scans or midwife appointments and no antenatal classes to visit which was making me feel like I was missing out on my father to be journey. I could finally be there for my partner and my little girl when they needed me the most.
So……. Our birth plan……. It was amazing. Candles, music, birth balls, birth pools, essential oils and minimum pain medication. Well that went out the window!
After 10 hours of my partner having really intense contractions and having to use gas and air and Pethidine injection to manage the pain we were moved to a delivery room in case she needed more pain relief. After the Pethidine kicked in we moved to the delivery room and just like that within 30 minutes she was at 6cms and it was nearly time to rock and roll.
At this point she was offered a epidural. After going over our EBRAN and talking to the amazing midwives we decided to not have it and to go with just gas and air moving forward. It was like that decision gave the little one a nudge and within the hour it was time to push! We were so glad that we didn’t go ahead with the epidural, as it would have taken around a hour to set up and kick in etc to only work for the very end of the labour experience.
As she started to push they realised there was something wrong. Our little one was getting distressed and not making an entrance (or an exit) when she pushed. A doctor was called and the decision was made to have an assisted birth using forceps. The little one had got the cord trapped around her neck and she needed to make her grand entrance (or exit depending on how you look at it) quickly. I won’t go into all the details but after a few jiggles, a cut, a slight pull, 4 midwives and a doctor the head was out and it was up to my absolute trooper of a partner to finish what she started and pushed the rest of our little diamond out. She needed a little help to get her first cry but after a minute she was laying on my partners chest looking absolutely gorgeous.
From the midwives point of view it was their time to clean up, stitch up, and give us some time to our self. From our point of view it was time to cry, rest, and adore our new family member and feel what I can only describe as the most moving, thought provoking and absolutely breathtaking feeling that I have ever felt.
So to summarise. Burton hospital midwifes and doctors are incredible. Not only did they look after my partner and daughter to be. They made sure that I was there, helping as much as I could and helping make important decisions when my partner needed me too.
My partner Kyla (and yes I know I’m biased) is the most incredible, strong, amazing and frankly breathtaken person I have ever known and she has given me a little girl that has absolutely taken my breath away and will do for years and years to come .
To the people in this group (TBTBC Online) and the amazing Bump to Baby ladies. From a first time father. What you have shown me on your video course, Q&A’s and posts made such a difference in not just my experience but Kylas. We stayed calm, used EBRAN and adapted to our new birth plan using what you guys have shown us. So all I can say is a huge thank you. Especially from a dad who has felt left out a lot of my families journey. This group has been a breath of fresh air and I really think more FTFs need to check you guys out!
Sorry for this massive story but I wanted to let you know that even with some antenatal experience, you guys and a couple of books you helped we managed to bring the most amazing little girl into our world.
Stay strong mother’s and farther to be. You all got this!!!!
And without further a do. Please may I introduce you to Indi Aurora. Born at 13:56 at Burton University Hospital weighing 6lbs 14oz.
Thank you!
For more information about The Bump to Baby Chapter’s Hypnobirthing and Antenatal Online Course. Videos, checklists, audios & a support group all created by a midwife to get you feeling excited and confident for birth.
🎈🎈Positive Birth Story🎈🎈(sorry – it seems really long!)
Hi everyone, please welcome Tomos Macsen Fall to the world 🥰 He arrived last Saturday 12.09.20 at 3.28pm – a healthy 8lb 2.5oz and nearly a week before his due date of 17th September – which I wasn’t expecting as a FTM!
On the evening of Friday 11th September (after a phone call where my mother-in-law was adamant he would arrive the next day & we laughingly disagreed) I went to bed as normal with no signs of impending arrival.
04.50am Saturday, I awoke due to a ‘pop’ and gush of warm fluid ‘down there’! Imagine my surprise! A visit to the bathroom and lots more continuing fluid confirmed to me my waters had broken!! I sat there for about 10 mins in excited shock I think. I wasn’t having contractions at this point so I wandered about for a bit & thought about going back to sleep…after nearly an hour I woke my partner. We decided to call labour ward and they asked us to come in to be assessed. I was starting to feel mild periody-type cramps at this point which started to ramp up pretty quickly and by about 6.30am were 6 mins apart. I attached my TENS machine & took 2 paracetamol. In the car on the way there they quickly became 3 mins apart and felt strong – I kept using the TENS Boost mode during the contractions & focusing on breathing.
I was assessed at 8am as 4cm dilated – yay! My partner then came straight up & we were taken to the delivery room. After another half hour, contractions were getting super strong at this point & I was starting to groan like a cow through them 🐄 as it seemed to help! My partner was reminding me to breathe & suggested I might want some music /oils but I declined as felt I needed to concentrate on the contactions. I found his touch extremely reassuring & calming though and his words helped me enormously 💗 I thought I wouldn’t want to be touched when in pain but it was the thing that helped most.
At this point, we used EBRAN to choose an epidural. I have a very mild form of Spina Bifida, but it meant if I needed a c-section I wouldn’t have been able to have a last minute ‘Spinal’ and would have had to have a General Anaesthetic. Although things were going well, I decided overall that it would be better to have a working epidural that could be topped up if I needed a section…GA was not something I wanted to happen if possible. I have to say it was the best decision we made…after about 30 minutes the pain disappeared and we really enjoyed excitedly waiting for the little man to arrive.
By 12pm, the midwife confirmed I was fully dilated 🙂 Pretty fast I think! They advised waiting another hour before pushing though due to the epidural. This is where things slowed down a bit…after 2 hours of pushing he still hadn’t arrived. We decided to try a bit longer. After 3 hours of pushing, he still hadn’t arrived (possibly due to the epidural, I don’t know). The doctor recommended intervention at this point – my blood pressure had started to rise & I had some protein in my urine. As my epidural was working really well, we decided to have forceps help. Wow! These babies are tough – the tugging was really strong! His head finally emerged on the final attempt (thankfully as they had started to prep theatre for c-section)…I was asked to stop pushing while they performed an episiotomy to prevent tearing at this point. He was then finally born and placed on my stomach 🥰💝😭 Emotions over-ran me then and I was overcome with love & relief.
My partner got to stay until 9pm, as we were in our own room. He left when Tomos & I had to transfer to post-natal ward. We stayed in for 2 days and came home Monday night. I have managed to pick up a mild infection in my episiotomy which has meant it is extremely sore & I can’t sit at the moment, but apart from that, I view the birth extremely positively and credit this course for giving me the knowledge & confidence to feel in control of decisions.
I was terrified of birth when I started this course so know that you CAN do it and you will have those angels called midwives & doctors with you every step of the way 🥰🤗 xxx
If you want to know about ways to keep calm during your birth, ways that you can stack the odds in your favour to have a great birth and techniques that you can start practising now in your pregnancy so that you can feel prepped, ready & excited for birth, then you can get all the information from the convenience of your own home on your own time, by accessing our online course.
An online course put together by UK midwife, Beth offering both hypnobirthing and antenatal education, which has helped women across the globe feel confident and calm during their birth.
My husband and I started The Bump to Baby Chapter online course when I reached the third trimester. The course was fantastic and really helped us to feel knowledgable and informed about labour and birth and helped me have such a positive birth experience despite it being very far from what I thought I wanted.
I had decided that I would love to have my baby at my local birthing centre and I had my heart set on a water birth, essential oils, relaxation tracks playing etc and we were really looking forward to this. However at 36 weeks, I was put up to high risk as my baby’s growth had slowed down so I needed consultant check ups, extra scans, 3x weekly CTG monitoring and a possible early induction. This was frightening and completely changed my birth plan and meant I’d need to deliver on the labour ward at the hospital. I was initially upset about this but used my EBRAN and affirmation tools to see this as a positive decision where my baby and I would be in the safest hands. Thankfully the baby’s growth didn’t tail off further and the consultant was happy for me to go into labour spontaneously.
When I was 40+2, my Braxton hicks that I’d been having suddenly started to become quite painful and I also had my show. My husband and I realised that this was probably it and baby would soon be arriving. The contractions were lasting 40 seconds or so and coming every 6 minutes, and they stayed this way for the next 24 hours at which point they were much closer together and were pretty strong. I went into hospital to be checked and was only 1cm so was told to go home and rest. This was disheartening but I had lots of hot showers, had my tens machine on full whack and breathed through each contraction using the techniques from the course. I must have spent hours in the shower as it gave me so much relief. Another 24 hours later, I was exhausted and the contractions were coming thick and fast. By this point, I could barely focus through them so we phoned the labour ward as I’d decided after 48 hours of contractions at home, an epidural was for me. They told us to come straight in and to my relief, I was 5cm and could make use of the amazing gas and air. It really helped me regain control of my breathing and focus through each contraction. As the anaethetist was in theatre, I also had morphine which somehow allowed me to doze off between contractions so I could recoup some energy. I was so focused and in my birthing zone, I totally didn’t care for a water birth etc. and was so happy with the gas and air. By the time the anaethetist was free, I was ready to push and within the hour, our baby girl was here. My body truly took over at this point! The midwife recommended an episiotomy to get baby out quicker but I wanted to try one last push myself and I was able to birth her naturally which was amazing.
Despite my birth being totally different from my initial plan, I still had the most amazing birth experience on the labour ward at the hospital. The midwives were absolutely fantastic and you would not have known a pandemic was going on!
The course really did enable me to enjoy my birth and make informed choices beforehand and throughout and I am absolutely amazed at what the body can do! The Facebook group has also been so supportive, as have Beth’s regular Q&A sessions. I dread to think how I would have coped with such a long labour without hypnobirthing and I am so grateful now that I can reflect on my birth with such positivity! 🙂
Want to know about ways to have a great birth?
You can get all the information from our award-winning, midwife led, hypnobirthing and antenatal classes but ONLINE with The Bump to Baby Chapter’s Hypnobirthing and Antenatal Online Course. Videos, checklists & a support group to get you feeling excited and confident for birth.
Emma Litchfield Birth Story – Unplanned ‘elective C – Section’ -Hector Andrew Litchfield
I just want to start this Birth Story by letting you know that you can have a positive birth even if it ended up being something you never even imagined.
My story starts 6 days before Hector arrived – it was a Friday night and I had a day of reduced movements- this was the second time this happened and so I called the Triage ward at Gloucester who told me to come in to be monitored– we knew the drill. So, I grabbed my notes and me and my husband, Henry, made the 40 min journey to Gloucester.
And of course, whilst we were waiting, our little man was having a party in there but we knew it was still a good idea to go ahead and get check and I am so glad I did.
Everything was perfect on the monitor and we were able to go home but we needed to come back in for a scan early next week- both of us questioned this as everything was fine and I don’t really like being messed with but the midwife explained to us that it was to check that the placenta was still functioning as reduced movements can be a sign that it is working as well as it could be.
My scan was booked in for the Tuesday so again we made the trip to Gloucester and I remember distinctly laughing during the drive there that I bet he would be dancing on the screen- what a cheeky baby! It would be nice to see him again at least.
We got to the scan and about 30 seconds in the sonographer comments ‘Oooo, He’s breech!’.
At 39 weeks which was such a shock especially as at my midwife appointments they were sure he was head down and 3/5th engaged.
So, we were sent up to the triage ward- I was in utter shock and started to really worry as I know my friend had a breech baby and ended up have a C-section which was something I really didn’t want, I spent time in my 3rd trimester visualising my birth and practicing hypnobirthing techniques and was hoping for a water birth with minimal intervention .
We were met with a surgeon to go through our options which were 1. to have an External Cephalic Verson (ECV) to try and turn him so I could have a natural birth and if that didn’t work to decide to carry on with a breech birth which could be tricky to get the right team on to support me or to have an elective C-Section.
After a what felt like hours and a huge amount of upset and tears, I decided to go for an ECV the risks to our baby were low and I really wanted a natural birth. On a side note the tears were not helped by the fact I hadn’t eaten since 7am and now I couldn’t eat in case the team needed to perform an emergency C-section after the ECV!
We were able to go home before the ECV was performed so we made sure we had everything we might need so a bag for me the baby bag just in case he arrived after the procedure- and then headed back in.
When we arrived back at the hospital, we were met by such a lovely midwife team who really helped to relax me, made me laugh and made sure I felt comfortable. They also felt the bump and were totally baffled– he felt head down!
I had quite an audience for the ECV as I don’t think they get many 39 week pregnant women in for one so I had two surgeons and a trainee doctor in with me as well as a midwife- who was brilliant in talking to me whilst the procedure was going on and holding the gas and air for me- she was wonderful.
The procedure itself is painful but worth it even if your baby doesn’t spin. It feels really wrong especially as we spend all of our pregnancy trying not to knock our bumps but at one stage I had two people pushing up and down on my bump trying to get him to spin- they gave it two tries but in the end it was just too painful to keep going but as soon as they stopped the pain stopped immediately. If I was in the same situation in the future, I would hands down have the procedure again.
Both myself and Henry had both decided that if the ECV didn’t work that we would go for an elective C-Section- so it was really easy once I had made a decision to go forward with it.
Again, the team were great- they talked us through what would happen and we booked a date – 6th February 2020- a Thursday.
It felt really surreal knowing the date of our baby’s birth rather than waiting for it like the other Mum’s in our TBTBC group – we spent the evening having dinner (hurrah!) and chatting through the day. It was a long chat, where I felt sad and disappointed that I couldn’t get the birth that I wanted, Henry was brilliant and listened to my thoughts and confirmed that fact I grew our little man and he would be arriving safe is an achievement in itself and a C-Section was still a birth. We ended up chuckling that we were so grateful that Bunty, who ran the Cirencester TBTBC, took us through what a C-section would involve so we felt less intimidated and before we left to come home from the hospital she came and found us to show me the operating theatre and the recovery room so I would be familiar with it when we came back in.
What happened next is something that I hope wold never happen to anyone else but sadly in the early hours of the Wednesday Henry’s Dad died. It wasn’t unexpected but it was a shock that it happened the day before his grandson was born- so where we were meant to have a day for us to get our head around that fact I was about to have major abdominal surgery and welcome our baby boy into the world it was now a day of grieving and making sure my husband was ok. Henrys family came over to ours for the day so we could be together. Henry messaged Bunty to let her know what had happened and to find out if we could book a private room- again the Gloucester maternity midwifes were incredible they made sure we had the space after the birth to have the privacy we knew we needed and I cannot thank them enough.
We both actually slept well the night before which was down to just being emotionallyexhausted but also because as I was going to sleep, I used the breathing techniques from my hypnobirthing course and it really helped calm me. I think I subconsciously used the techniques all through that day to keep me calm.
The next morning, I was a bag of nerves – I don’t like being messed with or having operations and I knew the recovery would take its time I felt quite scared and excited at the same time. To say I was a roller-coaster was an understatement but I kept myself busy- cleaning the house one last time! And Making sure everything was set for when we arrived home.
We were told we would be last on the list and so we didn’t need to go in until 11am however when we arrived, we met with our surgeon, Sophie, who then told us we could go now! Which was much better for me as I then had less time to worry. A Midwife came and got me and showed me where to get dressed and I was then walked down to the operating theatre – it all felt quite surreal.
Sitting on the bed receiving my epidural and spinal I was really nervous and used the breathing techniques to help calm me – the team were so lovely and there was a real excitement and positive vibe in the operating theatre – they seemed just as excited as me to meet our little boy. We had our playlist playing and some mini electric candles which made everything feel just that bit special.
I used my calming techniques throughout the whole birth and it was really lovely having Henry by my side. The surgical team also seemed to really like our playlist and were singling along and dancing to it- you really could forget that you were in an operation.
Hearing Hector’s first cry was the best (he was born to Elton John , Benny and the Jets) and he came straight to my chest so we could have a cuddle. I felt pretty tired and so the team then took him to be weighed and checked over whilst I had a little nap. Hector was born at 12.31pm a mere 1 hr 30 mins from when we arrived.
The reason why I put the Elective C-Section into air quotes as the title to this birth story is because I would never say that I feel that I elected for my C-section once the ECV was completed and failed we felt that it really was the only way to move forward safely however even if I didn’t choose to have it, it was still a positive experience. I was given the respect and time to make my decisions about the procedure- to have the drape up, to have a playlist and to have skin to skin straight away, our surgeon was great, she really understood it wasn’t my preferred method and made sure everything was a perfect as it could be. I was also given the space to be nervous without being judged and was treated with such warmth and kindness from the midwives and the surgical team – I will never forget and am so grateful to them.
Beth’s course was so useful especially around the different types of birth. The course helped us immensely and we didn’t even know we were going to need to know all about C-sections! I cannot recommend this course enough!
Hector’s middle names were after Henry’s Dad ‘Andrew’ and also his Great Grandad ‘Percy’ who was born on the same day.
Thanks so much TBTBC!
x
If you want to know about ways to have a great birth, how to stack the odds in your favour to get the birth you want and feel calm in all births then…
You can get all the information from our award-winning hypnobirthing and antenatal classes but from the convenience of your own home and on your own time, with The Bump to Baby Chapters antenatal and Hypnobirthing online course.
Check out our series of YouTube videos on how to make your better.
I would like you all to meet my little Oliver, who arrived 6 days late, today at 11.41am! He is 8lbs 6oz and 53cm long!
I definitely did not have the labour I thought I would- quite the opposite in fact, but I wanted to share the positives I am taking from it, thanks to Beth and all the team at TBTBC ❤️
Contractions started on Thursday morning at 5.30am, every 8 minutes or so. This was after my failed sweep on Tuesday, followed by a bloody show on Wednesday. I telephoned the birth centre where I was planning on giving birth, and was advised I was likely in very early labour, and to see how things went. The contractions waxed and waned all day. I used an app to time them, and they always ended up finishing without progressing, despite bouncing on my ball and going for a power walk.
Fast forward to 7pm that evening. The contractions started up again, and started feeling a little more intense. My partner and I joked about what would come of it, convinced they would stop. 8pm rolled around, and as I relaxed on the sofa, I felt a pop and a gush of warm water. Suddenly reality hit that our baby was finally on his way! We telephoned the birth centre and were told to make our way in. Feeling quietly confident, I was gutted to learn I was only 1cm dilated. Loaded with dyhydrocoedine, I was sent home and told to relax in the bath. I stayed in the bath for around 3 hours. I used my breathing techniques from the course, and snoozed inbetween contractions. Then something changed. Baby seemed to do a big movement, and the pain shifted to my back. I was suddenly in agony and could hardly catch my breath. In the end, my partner telephoned the birth centre again to tell them I wasn’t coping and needed to come back. The car journey back to the hospital was awful.
When I was examined, the midwife was delighted to tell me I was now 4cm dilated and now in active labour but baby’s heartbeat was too fast. I was sent down to triage to be monitored without my partner, and the anxiety started to kick in. Re-examined, I was told I was actually 2cm dilated, baby was now back to back and that’s why the pain was so intense. Panicking, everything I learned on the course (or so I thought) went out of the window. I finished off 2 cylinders of gas and air with little relief, crying out for my partner and someone to help me. But somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew there were still choices to be made, and despite birth preferences, the plan had always been to do what I needed. I plucked up the courage to ask for an epidural, despite it meaning I would have to birth on the delivery suite. Once the epidural had been administered, I completely relaxed. I was able to nap, take sips of water, laugh and joke with my partner and actually get excited about labour.
Our little boy’s heart rate continued to fluctuate, and it seemed to be every time I had a contraction. I had only progressed 1cm in 5 hours post epidural, and was warned that baby’s heart rate may be a cause for concern and a section may be needed. I used the tools from the course to stay calm. I told myself ‘if that’s what my baby needs, that’s what needs to happen’. I was given the hormone drip to see if things could be sped up, bypassing the need for a section. A clip was placed on baby’s head to improved the monitoring. Baby’s heart rate continued to misbehave, and I was determined as long as he was safe, it didn’t matter how he arrived. All of a sudden, I got a sharp pain in my right side and back. This coincided with a big drop in baby’s heartbeat, que doctors flooding the room, preparing to whisk us off to theatre. Because I was having pains, and fearing my epidural had started to fail, I was reexamined by my midwife. As she exclaimed ‘his head is nearly out, he’s on his way!’ I burst into tears. I was psyched up for a section, when there was no need.
I started pushing at 11:28, and at 11:41, our Oliver made his entrance into the World. I had to have stitches for a 2nd degree tear, and I have a graze- but apart from that I’m feeling on top of the world. My epidural wore off about an hour later, and I was soon in the bath, eating toast and drinking tea.
So as well as sharing my news with you all, I just wanted to share my story. Despite the scary moments, the pain, and the change of plans… I was able to stay focussed, accept the change of plans and also ask sensible questions using EBRAN. And that’s thanks to Beth, this wonderful group and the amazing work done by this team. Thank you everyone, and Good Luck with your journeys ❤️
If you want to know about ways to keep calm during your birth, ways that you can stack the odds in your favour to have a great birth and techniques that you can start practising now in your pregnancy to prep for birth, then you can get all the information from the convenience of your own home on your own time, by accessing our online course.
An online course put together by UK midwife, Beth offering both hypnobirthing and antenatal education, which has helped women across the globe feel confident and calm during their birth.
I had my daughter Eliza Ivy on 9th April 2020 – I elected for a caesarean following my previous induction and emergency caesarean under general anaesthetic with my now 26 month old daughter CiCi.
Throughout my pregnancy I thought I would have a VBAC – I wanted to experience going into labour the natural way and to feel my waters break and so on… Given the current COVID-19 pandemic, I started to feel panicked and decided that an elective caesarean would be the right choice for me. My husband also needed to look after our 2 year old so it became a reality that I would need to undergo the surgery alone. I was terrified and couldn’t sleep the night before. When I thought about it practically, I calmed down but it was the thought of not having my husband to hold my hand that made me quite emotional.
When the morning arrived, everything was calm – virtually tranquil. The ward, despite not being empty felt quiet and the staff at East Surrey Hospital were kind and reassuring. I was determined to breastfeed this time round after struggling and ultimately giving up the first time. So in I went with my colostrum syringes ready to store in the fridge. When it was my turn to have my baby, despite everything being explained to me, I will never forget the range of overwhelming emotions I felt in such a short space of time. Fear, relief, discomfort, ease, panic, calm, worry, joy, adrenaline, elation…
Ahead of time, the midwife in the surgery team offered to play my choice of music and to take any photos/videos I would like. In the end, my anaesthetist FaceTimed my husband so he could see my daughter being carried over the drapes – this was a new experience for us both as we had not seen our first daughter so soon after the birth. My midwife helped me downstairs to meet my husband and daughter – she took her time and didn’t rush us. This really made our reunion post birth so special.
I had skin to skin with my daughter and she fed from me straight away – our breastfeeding journey has been strong for nearly two weeks and I feel so lucky to be able to manage this time. I think that the pandemic has given me the blessing of time so that I am not rushing feeds or worrying about getting too much done at home. I’ve been able to recover at a steady pace and after he initial two days, it’s got easier each day. It’s not easy with a two year old, especially when she wanted to be carried and I can’t because of my wound but we’ve been making a conscious effort to make sure CiCi has lots of special time as well as fresh air and park visits so she doesn’t feel left out.
After my first birth which was challenging, painful and frightening, I felt so much more calm and in control this time round. I wanted to share my story with other mums to be who might be feeling quite anxious and unsure about their births. It might not be exactly what you imagine but the NHS staff are with you every step of the way 🤍
Thank you to Katrina for sharing her positivity with her birth story during this pandemic. For more birth stories click here.
